Once upon a time I was in my 20’s and I decided that I knew just about everything there was to know about everything. I had stuff figured out.
For example, I knew that:
- I would never drive a mini-van
- My kids would be well rounded and enjoy music from impressively cool and varied genres. Barney would not be a rotating CD in my car.
- My kids would never make giant messes in a restaurant
- I would never talk about potty training in a Bible Study
- My kids would never watch T.V. until after they were 3 years old.
- I would certainly never allow my kids to be “babysat” by the T.V. so I could finish cleaning the bathrooms in peace.
- My kid would never be the obnoxious kid screaming in Walmart
- I would never appease him by opening a not-yet-paid-for box of goldfish crackers and allow him to eat it while I finish my grocery shopping.
- I would never, ever, ever, home school my kids. Ever.
Oh, you silly, silly, girl.
Here’s what I now know (pay attention you 20-something-year-olds): never say never. Because God may have other plans for you, Missy.
Life is funny. And unexpected. And before you know it, you’ve opened that box of goldfish to calm your screaming kid in Walmart and find yourself singing along with Barney in the CD player as you drive home in your mini-van (I haven’t actually done the mini-van thing yet. But…all that space…and the automatic doors…and the magical DVD player…).
So now…after years of saying “No. Never. Nope.” to the H-word (I still can’t say it yet). I find myself saying a reluctant “yes” to homeschooling our little 1st grader. Oh my gosh. I just wrote it and now I feel a little sick.
In fact, today – instead of heading to the sweet little neighborhood school that’s just one block away from our house for Registration, I ordered curriculum. Online. And pressed “order”. It’s official. Next thing you know, I’ll be making my own bread, wearing long skirts, and making loads of babies. It’s just practical really… because I’m going to need more help for all those chickens I’m going to have in my backyard. And lots of kids sure will come in handy when I need help hanging the clothes on my clothesline after I clean them with the laundry detergent that I made from scratch.
Anything that I said I would “never” do is now on the table, people. That is reality.
Doing the thing that you said you would never do? It’s kinda scarey. But here’s another thing I know: God never asks you to do something hard without giving you the grace you need to do it. It’s freeing, really…knowing that I am really NOT in charge. How can something be scarey and freeing all at the same time? I’m not sure. But it is.
I’m going to be really honest, though, I’m still a little nervous about the time that I said (aloud) that I would never be a missionary anywhere without electricity and running water. Here’s to hoping that God will give me a pass on that one.